Today was our first Sunday back in our own ward. It was an odd day back and I really wasn't too excited to be back to our old church routine. I'm having a hard time with every daily event that we return to. Our lives keep moving forward and I'm not ready. I'm not ready for things to change, to try and go back to what things were before Graham. Needless to say today was one of those days that I didn't want to get back into. I really wanted to go to church, just not back to our ward, not yet. But we went and of course we heard exactly what we needed to hear today. The Spirit was there and touched my heart. We heard from Bishop Keller and President Gwynn today. They both had excellent messages. I was reminded of what a great blessing the Gospel is to us. I was reminded that if we don't keep pushing ahead and trying to be better each day that we will only fall behind. I was reminded that one of my children has made it to the Celestial Kingdom, so I can't get lazy now. I was reminded how much my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ love me. How Their grace saves me everyday. How they carry me when I feel I can't walk any farther and they suffer right along with me because they only know it's for my growth and benefit. I was reminded that They know me better than I know myself and they know the Plan. They know the beginning from the end and how this all fits together.
I've thought over the last few weeks about the Pre-mortal life and what we might have been like then. And after our meeting today I am confident that we chose our paths in life. That I stood up and said that I would do my part to give Graham his body and that I would give him back to his Heavenly Father. I'm sure that Mike and I made this decision there. But now we have no recollection of that. We're not sure why we had to give our son back so soon. The questions arise as to why and how and what could we have done different to have Graham here with us. But today the answer was given, again, that we knew we could do this. That Graham has a greater purpose on the other side of the veil. So today I'm especially thankful for the knowledge we have. For the knowledge that we came to Earth to be tried and tested. We knew it wouldn't be easy, it wasn't meant to be. Some of our trials would be harder than others, some would make us choose to be converted to the Gospel or to turn away. And so this trial in our life has been our greatest so far. It has been a testimony builder. It has made us better, stonger people, and I am thankful. I'm thankful for a loving Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ who never leave our sides, who let us suffer some for our benefit. For the bountiful blessings that they give us. Today I am thankful.
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17 hours ago
Sometimes it is very tough to be grateful for the hard times in our lives but you always do gain perspective later like climbing a mountain and looking down at the bigger picture. The higher you get, the more understanding you gain. I'm glad that you've been blessed with an eternal perspective on things, even though things are still hard, it helps to realize there's things going on bigger than us, bigger than now, I'm also so grateful we have the Plan. Thanks for this post. I read faithfully and am always uplifted. Your posts draw me closer to the Spirit.
ReplyDeleteYou want to know something... my trials seem insignificant in comparison to the despair that you have felt over the past months. I can only hope that I can endure my trials as you have and continue to do. Really, you all need to pat yourselves on the back for being an inspiration to so many.
ReplyDeletePS~ Is it rude that I comment and you can't see my blog?! If you want you can email me at cashsmommy@gmail.com
ReplyDeleteI love reading your posts because I've learned so much from you. Thanks for sharing!
ReplyDeleteHillary said it all.
ReplyDeleteI'm thankful that you share your testimony, that you share your ups and downs, and that I always feel edified after I read your words.
ReplyDelete