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17 hours ago
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Torn Between Two Worlds
Today we went back to the temple for the first time since Graham was born. I was ready to go back. It was nice to have a break from the world and have some time to think. As we sat through our session all I could think about was how the temple ordinances and having our family sealed together has a whole new meaning. Not that it wasn't important before, but maybe we took it for granted. We had our family together, here with us now, and so the importance of the ordinance wasn't fresh in our minds. As we finished our session and got to the Celestial room I thought to myself, "This is what we will be looking forward to. This will be where we meet Graham again." And as I watched other people at the temple today there were lots of weddings and lots of other people being sealed and I was reminded again how much our faith is based on families. How important families are to us. And today I was torn. Graham was with us today, we felt his spirit so strong. And I didn't want to leave, I wanted to stay forever. But the other part of me was longing to get home to Mitch and Libby. I was so torn, and when we did decide to leave it was hard. It felt like good-bye all over again. Right now I am torn between two worlds. I'm still here to finish my mission, to take care of my family here. But one day we won't be torn, we won't have to make the decision to leave, and we'll be together forever. What a blessing, one that was taken for granted before, but never again.
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Your insight and honesty are touching the lives of your friends and family. Hang in there...time really does lessen the raw pain. We love you:).
ReplyDeleteI always go to the temple and sit in the Celestial room when I want to feel my dad close to me. That is where I gain perspective and where I feel him and hear him and can be with him for a little while on this earth. I know it's not the same but I do know the pain of not having in this life someone you love and miss terribly. Oh what a blessing to have the temple - especially the celestial room :) Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteHow lucky we are to have temples in our lives, and testimonies of them. It is so easy to forget how really important they are, thank you for the reminder. I have wondered many times how it was for my mom to cross the veil to the other side and how it will be when I do the same and she is on the other side. I'm sure it is that much sweeter with your own child. I'm glad you guys got to go. I'm grateful you guys want to go and that good experiences have come for you with Graham, it's a testimony to me that Heavenly Father loves us and gives us tender mercies to endure these things. Again. . .thanks for the reminder.
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