Faith

Our society today is a "believing is seeing" society, and I would say that many times I would agree. But my faith has been strengthened more over the last few months than ever in my life. The trust we put in God that things happen for a reason. That all questions are not answered quickly or visibly, but come with time. When we first found out that there were problems with Graham I came home and got on the computer and read every article I could find on the Church website about trials with child loss and I bookmarked the ones that really stuck out in my mind. Today and went back a read a few and this one stuck out in my mind today. Read it here. Having faith is hard, and having faith and being positive is even harder. This last weekend I went back through my blog and read back to when Graham was born. I'm trying my hardest to find the positive in all this. And some days it's really hard to count my blessings. But there's no doubt in my mind that things work out for a reason. That God works in mysterious ways. That he works in small and simple ways. As I look back over the last year all the puzzle pieces fit together perfectly. It was about a year ago that we started thinking about having another baby, and I got REALLY baby hungry, which really isn't like me. It was something that I had to do, and soon. And then once I was pregnant I just had that feeling that something wasn't right, and then that was confirmed with the doctor and the rollercoaster ride began. But hindsight is 20/20 and everything worked out perfectly. Graham did everything he was supposed to. He got his body and enjoyed every minute he had with it. He came when he was supposed to, not when he was planned to. And the events after Graham's birth have all fallen into place too, as pleasant and unpleasant as some have been. So I'm trying to increase my faith and stay positive at the same time.

P.S. Did I mention that Mike is the King of Positive, so he's quick to remind me when I'm being Negative Nellie :)